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Nov. 30th, 2009

Cracked Heart

Every night I try not to wander into the forbidden places in my mind,
I slip, they tear me apart, the world then leaves me behind.
And not for the first time, I should say.
I have seen things, in the strangest of ways,
the saddest as well..
Nothing can stop a heart from breaking once it has cracked open.
It must be broken in half before it can begin to mend.
Then am I doomed?
My heart isn't broken, it has been cracked and damaged by the world, and mostly by you.
You never seen the crack that was there, and if so,
you wouldn't bother to care.
Somewhere a long the line I seen what you were to me, I put you on the shelf, and lockedeverything else away.
Now all that is left is my heart,
with it's crack straight down the middle,
stuck in the middle.
Not broken not whole, just with empty space here and there.
My pretty red heart, it still beats, it still pumps the blood that keeps me alive..
Proving that without out you
I am here, and I can survive.

Nov. 2nd, 2009

More, More, More Than You

Caught in some kind of web I see
And now you seek help from me
You should know, though I am the kind
sort
I will not let you distort
what I have created.

I am more, more, more than you
I say this because I know that it is true.
I will never do the things you do,
I will never be like you

I am more, more, more than that.
I will never wear the same smile,
not even the same hat.

I am more, more, more than you.
Lies,regrets and pains,
My heart bares little stains

I am more, more, more, than you,
I do not do what you do,
I will never be like you.




 

Sep. 26th, 2009

(no subject)


Take out the pen
begin to write
smell a smell
hovering around in the sky

Trust the pages of the
book
I go and don't look back
at what this world, from me, has
took.

(no subject)


On a summer's day
I faded away into a the hot
breeze.

I looked back and I
watched the world
fall down onto it's
knees.

Sep. 15th, 2009

Bad Weather and a Sinking Ship

It falls so hard the rain, don't know how you can stand the pain

How you can breathe with the wind in your face

How you can still run at that quick pace


How you can see through the thick fog

How you can live in the smog

Its silent, the eye of the storm i think,
im floating on sand, i think my ships about to sink.

Sep. 10th, 2009

Shuddering


I shuddered down, at the thought
The thing in my head that has brought
These visions back
In a little black sack
For me,
I haven't the time to waste, on dwelling
I must go on, still swelling
Pain cannot slow me
And fear will not fold me
Only shudder when I think
The memories I bring
To a room of folks
Its like a breathless smoke
So they try and get away
I shudder and leave them to play
No one sees, hears or shares my shame
I hide it all away and stick myself with blame
Heart gets heavier by the pound
I shudder and lock everything underground.

A Mess



The works of one can easily be the works of another
I've tried to reason, but the sting still rings in me.
Every night the scenes in my head,
and every night the life in me dead
Just to go to the dream, place where I am free
Not one knows my name and can never call to me
I am not ashamed, to be is shame itself
The wash of the brain still sticks to my hair
It is always close, I am always aware
Not a man can touch,   just he
Not a man will hurt,     the weak
Not a soul will laugh, at my turned back.
Yes, I have lived in a shack,
rundown and filth filled
The haunted house I left visits me time and again
And I often then, I 'remember when'
Forever the sky, shadowed and dark as rock
Forever the light is locked
The dirty work of one man, is the dirty work of the next.
The man who is left to clean up the dirty mess.

Sep. 1st, 2009

Yaay


August 29th, was the best..

Aug. 24th, 2009

Just another 5 days left!


Yes! 5 more days and It will be officially one whole year for me and Adan!

Aug. 23rd, 2009

6 days!


Only six more short days left until we get to celebrate our aniversary!!!

I just can't wait!

Aug. 21st, 2009

8 days left!


There is only 8 more days left, one week and one day, until mine and Adans ! year anniversary.
I am really excited, and very happy about it!!

I cannot wait

Angel


My angel, if youd listen to my plead, you'd know that it's you I need. Silver glows, stream from your face, I wonder,...Could this be a make believe place? Please, if ever a time comes when you must leave, won't you attach me to your wing? I promise to love you and all of your ways, just promise me, that you'll never fly away.

Suddenly A Realization of Genuine Happiness


I layed in my cold bed covered from head to toe by the warm blanket your words form; weaved layers of perfected beauty... Suddenly. Across my face, a smile. How can it be? No force behind this. I did not have to think of a happier time. Nothing has ever been this easy. And being happy certainly has never been either. But this is real. Undeniable as the sun that shines down on my skin. I trust you. With all of my being. With my heart my soul with everything inside me that makes me the person that I am.... Comfort..... I rested my head upon a pillow; soft with your touch.. Suddenly..Im at ease.. I can rest after not being able to for so long. I dont have to think about tomorrow. And im not thinking of yesterday..the things i cant change anymore. I can enjoy the moment I am in.. Happily and Guilt free... I hugged your body close. Grateful to breathe in the same air as you..to touch you..to look into your eyes..to kiss..to hold..to love you. Suddenly. I knew i was there. In that place. Safe. In Love.

Wish I could be your Princess Forever


This has been a dream i never dreamt in my life,
 I cant exactly find words..but everything feels so nice.
I talk and you listen, im inportant..thats some feeling..
hard to believe, still trying to wake up from a dream, and pop bak into reality..
But, yes, this is real..im awake with open eyes.. Your feelings are so pure..just wat u feel.
No lies.
At first it was hard to tell, if you were what i needed..simply because i didnt realize i needed you til i had you..
Now loving you.
Its just the thing to do. You take my breath away..
You take away my stress.. Forever, Ill be ur princess.

I got you


I Chose To Give Me Away, I Did It Today..Or Was It Yesterday, Maybe The Day Before... It Doesnt Matter, No Promises Shattered..No Dreams Fractured.. A Kiss Seals It..And Makes This Real.. Seperates It.. And Holds The Truth, This..Is..Reality.. Coming To Make Me Bloom, Take Me Out Of The Gloom.. I Wrote A Letter And In Return I Got You.. I Asked For Something New, I Asked For Something True, I Wanted Something That Would Do, You Were Happy, Now I Am Too.... I Want To Make You Love Me More With Every Page, Be Able To Touch Your Eyes And Hold Your Face.... Seal Every Word I Say With A Kiss... So You Remember All The Moments......... In Love, And Just Like This...

ROSE+ STAR = LOVE 4EVER


These Unraveling Silky Ribbons Of Truth From The Heart,
Comfort Me..And You..
Wrapped Around Us So That We Are Never Apart....I
nvisible Miles Of Thousounds Seperate Us Two ..
That Shinning Star Up In The Sky, Thats You..
And Im The Rose You Look Over ..Chained To The Earth.... Seems Impossible,
But We Both Know How Much This Love Is Worth.....
I Miss You When You Are Away, The Funny Things, And Everything You Say.. T
he Light You Spread, So I Can See.. You Put Good Thoughts In My Head, You Make Me Believe......
Yes My Roots Are Planted Here Where I Stay,
But You Know That Im Waiting For That Sparkling Day.....
I Want To Make You Fall Down To Me, Simply By Pulling A Lever, Where We Can Be Shoulder To Shoulder...
And Things Will Be Better....I
Want To Tickle You With The Truth..Using A Silver Feather, Because Really...
Rose@- + Star:t = Love (3 Forever....

My Heart


MY HEART, IT BEATS,
POUNDS AGAINST MY CHEST, DIFFICULT FOR ME TO TAKE IN A BREATHE, SILENTLY I'VE HIDDEN WHAT HAS PAINED ME,
THEN YOU,RESCUED AND CHANGED ME,
I'VE FORGIVEN MYSELF FOR KILLING THE GOOD IN ME,
AND THANKED YOU FOR BRINGING IT BACK..
NOW I CAN SEE, I REMEMBER, I KNOW, YOU WANT ME TO CARE, I DO,
A SMILE UPON MY FACE, AND I WANNA SHARE, WITH JUST YOU..
YOU ARE THE HEART BEATING WITHIN MY CHEST,
THE POUNDING THAT IS TAKING AWAY MY BREATHE..
BUT IT SEEMS...TO ME, THERE IS LIFE,
SOMETHING MORE YOU GIVE....
ITS ALL YOUR FAULT THAT I AM ABLE TO LIVE... MY HEART.

My Star


 IT SEEMS WHEN LIFES INKS BLEED INTO EACHOTHER YOU ARE THE CLEAREST PAINTING..
EVEYTHING THE WORLD HAS TO GIVE IS BLURRED...ITS JUST YOU I SEE..
TELL ME NOW PLEASE WHAT I CAN DO FOR YOU, BECAUSE..
LIFE WITHOUT YOUR LIGHT...DARK..AND FILLED WITH NOTHINGNESS...
ITS TAKING SOMETIME TO LET GO OF PAST LIVES..BT ITS ONLY GETTING EASIER...
YOU ARE THE GIFT OF A LIFETIME..
I NEVER THOUGHT I WOULD FIND...T
HE STAR IN THE DARK SKY PAINTED ABOVE..
SHOWING ME MY WAY... .....
YESTERDAY LIFE WAS A BLUR.........

.I WONDERED WHERE YOU WERE...
TODAY U WERE A STAR, SHINING BIG AND BRIGHT..........GIVING ME ALL OF YOUR LOVING LIGHT

Aug. 20th, 2009

9 more days left!!!


Yay! Just 9 more days left til mine and Adans 1 year aniversary!

I am really excited!!! I cannot wait!

Jul. 13th, 2009

Horizon, Moon, Sun, Stars...


The Horizon gleams "New Beginning"
And whispers in my ear,
Tells me that I,
Have nothing to fear.

The Moon shines to me, and knocks
On my door for a little chat
She tells me that I'm Ok,
Dries my tears with a kiss and a pat.

The Sun brightens the shadows,
I grow with each glowing ray,
I will reach the sky some day.

The Stars are my map,
They show me the way
Follow the bright one,
And I'm never lost,
But found.
Safe, and always sound.

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